(TMI alert)

There’s something inately satisfying about using the “sucker” and getting a six-inch long string of snot out of a baby’s nose.

This activity is not as satisfying to the baby, who will scream bloody murder at you for trying to help her breathe.

Sick babies don’t sleep. Well, at least MINE doesn’t.

Orange-flavored amoxicillin doesn’t bring on the “yuk face” that zantac does.

But it does create a lovely case of yeast rash.

Yeast rash turns a baby’s bottom red like a baboon’s.

Babies with baboon-red bottoms scream bloody murder when you change them, and act like you’re pulling their toenails out when you’re putting diaper cream on said bottom.

Probiotics are the baby’s friend. Getting the baby to actually swallow the probiotics is a bit of a trick.

Amoxicillin also turns my normally “slow digestion” baby into a Princess of Poop — about 8 poop diapers per day.

The Princess must be changed immediately following royal pooping activities, for royal poop irritates monkey butts.

Just because the Princess has pooped already this morning, that doesn’t mean she’s done. Not by any stretch of the imagination.

Liquid poop can spray an impressive distance out a baby’s bottom.

Satin-finish paint scrubs clean with all-purpose cleaner.
I knew there was a reason I didn’t paint my walls with a flat finish!